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| Tuesday, September 30, 2003 Me: yoyoyo jimbo Me: what's shakin James Suk: just my ass and everything in between James Suk: what's up
Monday, September 29, 2003 Thursday, September 25, 2003 This is the stupidest thing I thought of today: She's a maniac, maniac, that's f'sho And she's dancin' like she's never danced befo'... Pretty dumb, eh? HAHA...
I have decided the way in which i want to die: I want to die having crazy Bacchanalian sex with thirteen beautiful women. Yes, that's right, thirteen, not twelve, not fourteen, thirteen. A baker's dozen of beautiful women... ahhh....
Tuesday, September 23, 2003 I went to Burger King today. Having ordered my late lunch, I stood around waiting for it, putting the change I got back in my wallet. This guy got my attention and asked if he could borrow a dollar for food, that he'd pay me back tomorrow. I told him it wasn't necesarry to pay me back, that I'd just give him the dollar. He then began to talk to me about the free bibles they were handing out at school, he asked if I wanted to buy a church raffel ticket (that they were good luck), and showed me a picture of Jesus he carried around with him, commenting that it was a timeless picture of "Him," even though there are so many other pictures of "Him." I acknowledged him, but didn't really respond too much. It amazes me how a man like that can believe so much in such things. This man had nothing. I felt bad. Yet, he believes so whole-heartedly in something which, to me, is so clearly non-existant. I'm not quite sure how to describe the feeling this man gave me, it's somewhere between pity and awe; I did not like it. How can this world be so terrible to such trusting people?
Wednesday, September 17, 2003 I decided to do some new craps in addition to this blog... This new idea of mine is for shits and giggles only; whereas, Elvis Clock Fantasies is for more personal shits and giggles. Enjoy.
Saturday, September 13, 2003 Monday, September 08, 2003 Alright folkies, my apologies on the somewhat X-rated posting just below there, but I've decided to take my blog in an exciting and drastically new direction, as you can see be the exciting and drastically new title! OH, THE DRASTICITY OF IT ALL!!! (I now LOVE that word, despite the fact that it’s not an actual word, per se...) ANYWAY, today's pondering to the all-knowledgeable Elvis Clock: Oh glorious Elvis Clock. In all thy infinite wisdom please answer my little questions. What is the purpose of love, oh great and mighty Elvis Clock? Why do we love? How do we love? Is it something we feel, or is it something we think? Are we just aimlessly thrown about in a torrent of thoughtless emotion, or is it something that can be rationalized, and the best course of action decided and executed? Oh Elvis Clock, enlighten me! The Elvis clock sits on the wall, lip raised and legs swiveling about. Oh thank you Elvis Clock, you truly are the source of all wisdom.
Thursday, September 04, 2003 Okay, so I've changed my blog to "Zhang Ziyi Fantasies" because she is so hot, and is much better than stupid Alex Trebeck... So, here we go... Zhang Ziyi: (in Chinese) Hi. My names Zhang Ziyi, and I dont know any English... Me: Oh, hello. I'll help you with your English! Zhang Ziyi: Oh, thank you. What do you call this? Takes off her shirt and points to her breast. Me: Oh, that's a breast... OH YES. I like being a teacher... AND THUS ends today's Zhang Ziyi Fantasy. Am I a pervert? Of course I am! But they're my fucken fantasies, and they're DAMNED HOT!!! Ahhhh....
Why do I have a history of attraction to unappreciative girls? Am I so horrible that I do not deserve a normal relationship? OH Josh, stop feeling sorry for yourself! HEeeEY! Fuck you third-person voice in my head. I'll feel sorry for myself if I want to! And I do... Why can I not find a resonable girl? What is the problem? Why have I been attracted to girls who couldn't care less whether or not I liked them. Girls who have no clue what I do for them. Have I done something so horrible, so offensive to somebody at some time that I do not deserve a good relationship? Do I not deserve a girl I can just have fun with, just watch a movie one night, or talk about stupid things people in my classes have said? Or is it that such a girl does not exist? Where did all the good girls go? Am I beeing too wanting, too desperate? Too anything? Not enough something? Not something? Anything? Does it even matter? What would I do about anything anyway? I would not change. I do not care to change. So why ask these questions? Well, for one, I was staring at my roof thinking about my past relationships. I do not like my past relationships. I do not like my past. It was too easy then. It is too hard now. Are you still reading this? You probably shouldn't be. This is all babbly over-analysis, and I'd seriously be surprised if it made any sense the next time I read it. What?! You're not going to read this. It's boring Yeah third-person voice in my head, you're probably right. I should listen to you more often Damned straight you should. And what was with that blog entry? You're everything you hate. Shut the fuck up and get over it. Yeah, you're right again. Wow, two for two... not too shabby. Thanks!
Tuesday, September 02, 2003 This just happened, and I must post it before I forget it. This is a telephone conversation with David, just moments after he left my apartment. (Phone vibrates on the table behind me) Me: Yeah? David: Is there any reason why I wouldnt be able to open the door? Me: What door? David: The gate. Me: ...Push. David: Ohh... it opens that way! Okay, thanks. Me: (laughing) Late. David: Late.
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